Who Gets In During Collapse? Build Your Group SOP

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Group membership during collapse. It sounds simple until it isn’t.

Someone knocks. They need help. You know them—or maybe you don’t. But they’re standing at your front door. They’re tired, scared, hungry, maybe sick. And they need help. You have stew cooking. Their kids haven’t eaten in days.

You know that sharing your food is taking away from your family. Every meal you share with other is one meal closer to you and your loved ones starving.

That moment is not the moment to start thinking about how your group handles new members. Unless you’re welcoming everyone into your home or giving away your food and resources, that moment will be difficult. That moment could be gut-wrenching.

In this article, I’m going to walk through how to figure that out now—before it matters. These same standards, adapted to your situation, can also help you select potential group members before a collapse happens. If you’re solo or haven’t built a MAG (Mutual Assistance Group), this is still for you.

Use it now, during relatively peaceful times, to guide who you train with, who you invest time into, and who you’d even consider bringing into your inner circle if things go bad. Because in a real breakdown, every person you bring in affects your safety, sleep, food, and future.

TL;DR: Decide now who you’d let into your group during collapse. Use trust, skills, risk, and resources as Standard Operating Procedures to protect what you’ve built.

Set the Standard Before the Knock

Don’t wing it. You need a clear SOP for group membership.

Not a manifesto. Not a legal contract. But a simple understanding between you and your people: We can’t let everyone in. So, who are we willing to bring in? Who are we not? What makes someone a good fit—or a bad one?

Start with four categories:

• Core Values (Trust)
• Skills
• Risk to the group
• Impact on resources (Short-Term vs Long-Term)

If a potential member checks the box on all four, they’re probably a solid bet. If they raise red flags in one or more, think twice. And, if they’re a no across the board, they don’t get in. It really can be that straightforward.

Can You Trust Them?

This is the first gate. If you can’t trust someone, nothing else matters.

Ask yourself:

• Have they proven themselves in small ways before?
• Are they steady when things get hard?
• Do they run their mouth? Stir up drama? Vanish when it’s time to help?
• Do they give off a bad vibe or energy? Do you ever get a feeling of “I don’t know about this person.”

People show you who they are over time. Believe what you’ve seen—but don’t assume that’s the full story. If someone hasn’t had time to build trust with you, then they haven’t earned a seat at your table.

You’re not just letting them through a gate. You’re letting them into your inner sanctum.

That comes with access, insight, and opportunity—including the opportunity to hurt you, even if unintentional. It’s not about being suspicious. It’s about being smart.

A slow, structured integration process helps everyone settle in while maintaining a safe environment for the group. If someone can’t meet you halfway and show that they can take care of themselves while building trust, it’s a sign that they may not be a good fit.

Do They Bring Value?

That doesn’t mean they need to be Rambo or a wilderness EMT. But everyone should contribute something.

• Medical knowledge
• Gardening or food preservation
• Defensive capability
• Childcare or elder care
• Water procurement and purification
• Calm, clear thinking

Willingness matters more than a resume. Are they ready to help—even if it’s just pulling watch or cooking meals? How can they help, and are they willing to contribute to making the group’s lives safer, more secure, and more enjoyable? Or are they showing up empty and expecting to be saved?

Are They a Liability?

Some people carry more baggage than they are worth.

If someone brings conflict, instability, or dangerous habits, they could endanger the whole group. That includes people who can’t manage themselves, their issues, or their attitude.

Hard truth: A liability will not only damage the group, it could rip it apart. Adding a person who isn’t in sync with the group’s expectations will only exacerbate an already stressful situation. You shouldn’t tolerate that. There’s a good chance that that attitude problem is a ticking time bomb waiting to explode your group.

What Do They Cost the Group?

Resources matter. One more mouth to feed might be fine. Five more might break the system. Over time, that one mouth can use up a lot of your resources.

It’s not just food and water. It’s sleep cycles, fuel, hygiene, physical space, attention, and security.

Ask:

• Are they bringing supplies with them so as not to impact the group?
• Can we realistically support this person?
• Do they bring enough value to offset their needs?
• Is this a temporary situation or an indefinite one?

Isolation Time for Newcomers

If someone makes the cut, that doesn’t mean you fold them straight into your group.

Set a standard quarantine/isolation period:

• 14 days
• Physical separation (tent, shed, outbuilding)
• Confirming that there are no illnesses and giving them a chance to see how they respond to group rules.
• Clear rules: no movement without escort, no access to group spaces, no physical interactions with members. (Have SOPs for treating sick newcomers.)

This isn’t about punishment. It’s about protecting the people already in your care. You don’t know if this person is sick, unstable, or casing the place.

Give it time. Let trust build slowly.

Who Decides?

Establish that now.

• Is it a group vote?
• Is it a leadership decision?
• Does anyone have veto power? (There should be one or more people who can veto admission to the group. Periodic votes can be taken to see if the veto vote is changed.)
• Vote to admit someone to the 14-day quarantine. Vote to extend the quarantine 14-days.
• Vote to admit or revoke admission into the group post-quarantine.
• One-year probation vote for full admission.

A decision made without adhering to a set of rules that everyone operates from can lead to division and the destruction of the group. Set the rules now so you don’t fracture later. Consider how you will modify a rule should the group decide that changes are needed.

The Guest Option

Not everyone needs to be a permanent member.

Maybe someone needs a place to rest, refuel, and move on. If you have the means, consider offering limited access and short-term support. But make it clear:

• You’re not offering long-term shelter
• You’re not sharing all your plans and supplies
• You’re not merging groups

Keep them out of your internal workings and locations. You never know what their motivations will become once they leave and need more support. Your information could be used against you.

Talk Now, Not Later

If you have family or friends who think they’ll show up if things go sideways, have that conversation now. Sort through your thoughts on what I’ve discussed here. Establish your current perspective on how you would handle this.

Then, ask others to share their thoughts and explain why they think/believe that way. Next, ask them what they think about your perspective on the situation. Don’t try to convince them that you’re right. Instead, where something they said makes sense, or gives you something to consider, add it to how you would deal with people showing up on your doorstep during a long-term disaster.

Use their thoughts to fine-tune your thoughts.

Ask:

• What do you think would happen in a real emergency?
• What about a long-term SHTF event?
• Where would you go?
• What would you bring?
• What do you expect from me?

You don’t need to be harsh. But you do need to be clear.

The Bottom Line

Your job as the leader of your home or your group isn’t just to provide. It’s to protect what you’ve built.

That means thinking through the hard calls ahead of time.

Figure out who gets in before the knock ever comes.

These are my current thoughts on how to handle it. They’re not legal advice or some formalized security doctrine. If you’ve got a better way of looking at this—or something that’s worked for you—I want to hear it. Shoot me an email at [email protected].

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