I’d be a terrible natural resources department director. There’s way too much compromise and scheming required to turn an agenda into action. But, I’d be a great czar, where my orders would be carried out without question.
I think all hunters and anglers have gripes with their state’s wildlife agency and we all have our own ideas on how fish, game, and habitat should be managed. Wouldn’t it be nice to just make those changes — or should I say, improvements — without any meetings, bureaucracy, or input from the public?
I know that this is the exact opposite of how science-based wildlife management in America is supposed to work (and for good reason), but this is my fantasy, so hear me out. Here’s what I would change (effective immediately) in the imaginary world where I have unilateral control of my home state of Virginia’s Department of Wildlife Resources.
Snakeheads Will Be Granted a Game Fish Designation
The non-native snakehead was first found in Virginia waters in 2004. In the 20 years we’ve had them here they haven’t eaten dogs, people, or all the bass — despite the sensational reports. As far as a non-native species goes, they’ve been minimally invasive and have given anglers an exciting new species to target. Granting them a game fish designation would mean they’d be eligible for state records and limits could be managed for a sustainable population. It’s not unprecedented that a non-native species becomes a game fish. The largemouth bass, rainbow trout, and brown trout are all beloved game fish that were introduced to Virginia waters.
Turkey Hunting with a Rifle Will Be a Crime
Currently you can hunt turkeys with rimfire and centerfire rifles during the fall and spring season in Virginia. I’d like to end that for many reasons including safety and because it’s a dumb way to kill a turkey. The penalty for sniping turkeys, would be a ticket straight to jail and then, likely, to hell.
The Kings Grant Law Will Be Erased
The king of England way back in 1726 gave some land to someone and that “patent” gave precedent to lawyers to block waterway access. So now if a Virginia landowner owns both sides of a stream, they own the stream bed as well and can block access to anglers wading up stream.
There’s already a law on the books that says the stream bed is public property, but it has the important caveat that the land be “ungranted.” I’m going to undo what those clever lawyers did and return access to the people.
Commercial Menhaden Fishing Will Be Banned
The Chesapeake Bay is a nursery for a large population of striped bass and many other saltwater game fish. One of their primary and most nutritional food sources is menhaden, but what makes those fish great forage also makes them a commodity. Menhaden is used for pet food, omega supplements, and it’s critical to feed the increasing need for farm-raised salmon. One of the largest menhaden fishing fleets has its home in the Chesapeake Bay. With me as czar, that’s over.
My order is this: Virginia waters are closed to commercial menhaden fishing. Menhaden boats cannot land or depart from Virginia ports.
Good riddance to the wholesale destruction of a valuable resource and the nasty smells the menhaden processing plant produces.
A License Will Be Required for Hiking, Biking, Camping, Backpacking, Boating, Kayaking, Rafting, Horseback Riding, and Canoeing on Public Lands
I’d create a recreational license for all non-hunting or fishing activities. So if you like hiking on nice trails on public land or using boat ramps on public waterways, you’re going to have to start paying for that privilege. The annual cost will be no more than a freshwater fishing license and the money earned will go straight toward improving the public lands you enjoy.
If you already have a hunting or fishing license you won’t need to buy a recreational license.
Spring Bear Season Is Open
Virginia has a large black bear population and hounds are the best way to hunt them in fall. But a spring bear season with bait would be an additional and an effective way to manage bear populations and give hunters a new season to enjoy.
Gun Season Will Be Shortened and Bow Season Will Be Extended
My orders thus far have been pretty generous to the public, but this one is all about me. I’m a bowhunter and I hate the structure of Virginia’s bow season. It starts the first Saturday in October and effectively ends when muzzleloader season starts on the first Saturday in November. That means the most challenging way to shoot a deer has a short season during the most challenging time of year to see mature deer during daylight. Bow season is always an uphill battle of too many acorns and 80 degree temperatures. Then just as the hunting gets good, here comes the muzzleloaders.
I’m changing bow season to September 1 through November 15. That gives bowhunters an opportunity to shoot a velvet buck and to hunt the start of the rut. Gun season currently lasts more than a month, which is way too long — especially in dog hunting counties. It’s now going to be a two week season and muzzleloader season will also be two weeks.
Bounties on Raccoons, Oppossums, and Coyotes During Nesting Seasons
Turkey, quail, and grouse populations are in trouble throughout the southeast. Getting more trap lines set during their nesting season has been proven to help recruitment. I’ll pay bounties on nest robbers and I’ll open trapping seasons on public lands during those key times.
Annual Prescribed Burns and Selective Tree Harvest Will Happen on Public Lands
Biologists will be quick to point out that while trapping can have benefits for poult recruitment, it’s not effective without proper habitat. That’s why I’m also mandating creating large areas of new growth every year by conducting burns, selective tree harvesting, and clear cuts. Then seeding native grasses in those fresh burns and cuts. This will be most critical in the western portion of the state where the national forests have large stands of mature hardwoods and desperately need some diverse habitat for wildlife.
Poaching Will Have More Creative Penalties
The poaching of one of the most famous and photographed urban deer in my hometown was shocking. The poacher received a license suspension, a five-figure fine, and three months in jail for his crime. But given that he poached multiple deer, I think he got off easy. One of the problems with simple fines is that poachers are often not able to pay them, and the state (and therefore the public) are never able to recoup the losses.
So I have a new system for dealing with first time and repeat offenders.
Putting people in stocks and throwing rotten food at them crossed my mind. But I’m a modern ruler and I needed a modern solution. First time poaching offenders will spend their weekends improving wildlife habitat, and spend a week outside their local fishing, hunting, or gun store with a sign that says “I’m a poacher.” The fines and community service are to restore what they stole. The shaming technique will hopefully discourage other offenders. It also prevents putting people in jail who maybe had a one-time lapse in judgment.
Serial poachers on the other hand are going to find themselves in a new home with unpleasant roommates for at least a year.
No More Shooting Kentucky Elk
Virginia is currently putting in massive efforts to restore elk populations. But you can still shoot elk outside of the designated restoration zones with a deer tag. I think bringing elk back is a worthwhile and exciting effort, so let’s just bring them back and stop killing them if they are in the wrong zipcode.
The UpShot
I think we’ve all shared the daydream of being able to just get stuff done in the name of better hunting and fishing. Unfortunately, that’s just a day dream and we have to work together to make change. If you want real improvements in your home state, you’re going to have to go to meetings and, yes, compromise. One of the easiest ways to have your voice heard is during public comment periods and you should also write to your lawmakers. You might be surprised by how much influence you can have.
If you want to take a step further you can join a local chapter of Trout Unlimited, National Wild Turkey Federation, Rocky Mount Elk Foundation, and the many others to work on projects in your backyard.
Or, everyone can just agree to appoint me czar.
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